Letters With Love - 08

People ask me, ‘Don’t you love her? Why don’t you just accept that?’ I usually smile at their ignorance. But the real question here is, how can I call it just love if it was more than the word itself? A feel is worth more than just a combination of vowels and consonants – I feel.

When I travel alone, it is little difficult to look outside the windows – you know why? Not that I expect you somewhere out but I remember and relate simple things with you and I lose control of what is real around me. Even then, I sometimes caught hold of things which would interest you and imagine how you would have reacted if you were here. I do imagine them even when you are around me, but I love the surprises you give me every time with your reactions!

So I stopped staring outside and started looking into my mobile always. While going through the photos in my mobile I stop at certain – you know where? Maybe sometimes a quote you loved or most times it’s you.

I remember those days, when I just don’t feel like working, I call you up, talk and smile a little and get back to work. But now I prefer distracting myself to work more but you know, whenever I stop – I still think of you!

It may be easy to move on than holding on to it, but I love striving any harder just to hold you on. I really don’t know what is the real meaning for the phrase ‘miss you’ – but whenever someone ask “You look like missing someone always, don’t you?” I get your face flashing with a smile – bringing a little smile over my face and I reply – “Always? It’s just sometimes!”

You always reduced your time with me as you wished me to spend more time with others. But do you know when I don’t talk to you – I don’t talk to anyone. I never wanted to ease the time but it happened naturally now and I feel lonely than ever without you here!

Sometimes I just talk alone, just like I write – may be people call it psychic, but you know why I do that still? I feel words travel far and somehow I believe you hear!